aimlessly, flawlessly, hopelessly me

i think it might be because i couldnt remember my password. at all. and then got too lazy to find out what it is AND do something about it.

so, since last year i have dumped that boy, bought a car, crashed the car, bought another car and crashed that too. i became a cub scout leader, met a new boy, FINALLY got fulltime work, ditched the cellar door and the library ( :'(  bye bye library) and took a year off uni. i think thats most of the big stuff covered.

actually, thats all the big stuff covered.

i like people.

i got my P's last week.

WOO! GO ME!!!

i got a boyfriend; wow, about a month ago. wow. i didnt think it had been that long.

mum and dad sold the getz yesterday, so we no longer own a car that i can drive. so im frantically looking for a car so that i can get to work on saturday morning. but, i dont think i'll have one that quickly - it IS thursday already.

im also frantically looking for a job. i dont care whether its for the summer or for the ever. i need the money. how else am i supposed to pay for the petrol that i will expend driving all my friends places?

if anyone knows anything about a job or the like, it would be much appreciated. i would like it very much.
because i'd like to have money.

money is good.

and thats all i have to say to you today.

yeah; stuff.

uni is over   :( & :)

and i went clubbing with julia and clare not long back and we all hooked up with these guys and it was good fun.
we gave them our numbers and they keep msging us.

but in other news: bessie has a boyfriend.

and so, now i dont know what to do about kenny (club guy).

bessie's guy is alex. he's 17, he just finished yr 12 at mt lilydale (my old high school) and he's pretty awesome. i mean - i like him. if i knew how to embed pictures in here, i'd do that, but you'll have to survive with a picture in the avatar thingy bit.

and then bessie runs out of things to say; 'cept that she didnt get the job at the state library.   :'(

oh well.
 

bessie is off looking for a full-time job. or, as she likes to call it - a real job. and then, next semester, she's going to go down to studying part-time, rather than full time because she's not doing any work, nor learning anything.

for instance - i was sitting outside of a classroom at uni, where i whould be studying for my databases test, but i was writing this.

so, yesterday i applied for a job as a marketing assistant at the state library.

and hopefully, i get it.

because this uni thing is driving me up the wall. and im hating it. i love the people and my friends; but im not happy.

so im looking for a real job. 

please still love me...

and so ends the secondlast week of uni. 

well, not quite "ends" because it's not done yet. class still has 2.5 hours to go. but as it's all revision, i feel i can say that. 

i hate revision

and life is being weird. but, weird can be good! just, not always.

so , i think, i shall relate to you just one story from my day yesterday, because it will just ket you know my whole state of mind at the moment. woot.

shan and julia and clare left I&I before i did. because i was doing group work and none of them were in my group. :( 
so when i was finished with my group work i quickly packed up and disappeared. and then i was on the train at mitcham before i realised that my phone wasnt in my pocket. i remember it being on the desk in the i&i room, but i dont have it on me now. "oh, shit"
so i run down to the city as fast as i can and went back to the classroom. and it wasnt there. shit. so i go to reception, it hasnt been handed in there. i talk on the phone to my tutor who also hasnt got it nor seen it. shit. i go to security, not there. it's not at the hub (student reception) nor the library. which are all places that they may have been handed in. shit. 
but the hub was able to tell me that it probably wasnt stolen, because it was still ringing, and if it had been stolen, it wouldnt ring. ok, so thats good news. but it doesnt help me RIGHT NOW!!!

so i go and try to ring it in the hope that someone will pick it up and i can do stuff with it. but, no. i ring it 16 times and no-one picks up. great. IM SCREWED. MUM'S GONNA KILL ME.

i give up and go home. some friends get on at ringwood, and i talk to them from croydon to lilydale and tell them my story, and alley (my gorgeous alley) says "im going to ring your phone and see if it's in your bag" and she does.

and, guess what. IT WAS THERE. 

i felt like such an idiot. i'd called myself 16 times, and not realised that the damn thing was in my stupid bag. ON MY BACK!!!

i am such an idiot.
 

man i hate winter. i'd put on the fire but its 2 .30 and im only going to be home for another 45 minutes, if that. and im sitting here, unable to feel my fingers, feet or any other part of my body that i actually like.

stupid cold should be banned.

but otherwise, im sitting, on the net, not doing my uni works because uni is evil and i dont want to create a database. i dont know that first thing about databases. nor xml. nither can i find anyone who knows the slightest thing about either of these to help me who isnt completely stressed out by having to create a database and work out what the hell is wrong with html that makes people want to use xml.

uni should be banned.

i dont know what else i'd do, but it'd bee much hotter than uni. not only because uni sucks balls, but also because the heating is inadequate. i freeze, almost every time i go to uni. and some days, it just isnt worth it.

however, i do like shannon-nn-nn-nn, iulia and clare bear. they are some of my favourite people ever. i just wish they were easier to hang out with then they are,but then, i wish that about a lot of people.

speaking of hanging out with people; im going to see nicki and sarah tonight! yay! 

i saw them last week on wednesday, but we didnt really get to hang out. well, i got to hang out with nicki, but then kaela and kat came and sarah arrived later and the next day sarah had to take kaela home, so there was no hanging out with the sarah. 
and you know how when the group dynamic is good, it doesnt matter how many of you there are, everyone has a say and a good laugh and everyone finds out whats going on in everyone elses life? well, that didnt happen on wednesday. kaela was too annoyed at her ex boyfirend (with whom she has not been attached for OVER A YEAR) and his new girlfriend to let us talk about anything else.

i know i dont particularly enjoy hanging out with kathryn, but for some reason the only time she got to talk to me was when i followed her out for a smoke (not that i smoke, she does) which was icky, and even then kaela followed us outside.  kat is usually as obnoxious as kaela, but not this time. weird.

kaela is so annoying about her ex that she even intruded on my hanging out at the drive in on tuesday with clare and julia. apparently alex (her ex) and his mates were being a bum to nicki over msn. AT 12.35. GOD,  i would love for people to remember that i prefer to be asleep at that time. and if im not, it's because im trying and failing to get to sleep. ok, yes, tuesday i was at the drive-in, but it was still late. but, i dont understand why she had to warn me about it. kaela doesnt even have my msn herself, so how her ex would get a hold of it i dont know.

i just dont understand that girl.

so, nicki sarah and i are holding our own catch up session so that we dont have to deal with her venting about god knows what.  and so that we are actually able TO catch up.

god. i wish that my high school friends weren't so bound by group politics. because when she hears about this she's going to murder me. or *shock horror* even worse! un-friend me on myspace! oh please, dear god no!

i wish i didnt care so much.

so i went to the pat and brendan gig on staurday and it was awesome. you should either check out their myspace (www.myspace.com/patandbrendan) or ask me to buy you their album(which does involve you giving me money) if you dont believe me. and then you have to remember that they recorded the album before they got the 'jazz syndicate' or the awesome pat and brendan band. and so the live stuff is even more fantastic than the recordings if that is even possible.
which, i have to say, it is. amazingly enough. they are fantastic and they just keep getting better and better. because they are THE FANTASTIC. and because both pat and brendan are old friends of mine, they'd kill me if they knew that i just gave them such a huge plug, but they are pretty damn awesomethat and if they knew that i facilitated the piracy of a copy of thier album (watch out yoru yumi, they'll be after you for money if they ever find out!)

and i've been asked to accompany brendan to some jazz-nesses out, where-ever we can find jazz-nesses that we can get to and can afford. but thats sounding pretty sweet.

i thought i heard some flute on one of the songs in my itunes, but i cant find it and it takes forever to go through all my songs (well, not really, but 2 days of solid listning is a LONG time) and i really wanted to hear it and actually listen to it because then i could see how they fitted the flute around the melody so that i could take some ideas back to the discerning eye and the rest of the ample love handles repatoire and have some awesome flute parts in it all.  
which would be nice and everything.

umm, there was something else going on with the musics, besides that im listening to it more than im doing my i & i lit review that is due today. but, you know. i dont really like heather, so i'm gonna keep her waiting, until late late late tonight. though, hopefully it still will be tonight when she gets it. considering i havent started writing it yet.

but i really want to do stuff with my music!!!

damn uni!!!!!!!

in my room, on the blimpage forums. (which i dont recommend you look at; unless you know who adam from beyond mine is. and if you do, then i laugh at your face.) just sittin'. and i thought: LIVEJOURNAL

and so, i came to livejournal, and posted some stuff. its not interesting; but its there.

and it served to amuse me for 5 minutes.
which is pretty cool.

and now onto the i & i lit review. yay, just what i always wanted.

and i cant even hand it in on monday! the stupid building is closed. coz its a bum. bumface. so i have to be very nice to kureru and beg her, BEG HER, to please hand in my assignment on sunday. and give her permission to forge my signature.

because uni just happens to suck.

suck.








lots.